it happened to me: a 'feminist sex and relationships therapist' with 'two PHDs' told me I didn't understand consent because I didn't go to college

or how men weaponize their 'professional expertise' in order to gaslight women

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via Nicole Tersigni

I did not tell him I didn’t go to college which is why I blocked him immediately after he tried to weaponize my lack of degree(s) against me. I had made it clear days earlier that I was no longer interested in meeting with him in person after he assaulted me with a string of sexts with zero wind-up.

This happens to me often, especially after I admit that I’m a writer and often write about sex. An invitation many men assume to mean that I would like to see their dicks immediately as if they’ve just realized I’m the director of the musical they are auditioning for and must immediately belt out something from Phantom of the Opera.

There is an art to sexting in the same way a dick pic can be erotic but many men do not understand that a great song begins with a lead up and doesn’t assault you with LET YOUR SOUL TAKE YOU WHERE YOU WANT TO BEEEEEEE out of absolutely nowhere.

In fact, the way a man approaches sex in conversation is very indicative of the way he will approach sex in person. There is a stark difference between being uninhibited and inappropriate. A man who cannot read the room let alone your cues is not going to be a great lover let alone a safe one. And a man who prioritizes his need to show you his dick over your desire to actually see it isn’t going to give a fuck about your pleasure, your autonomy or your feelings. And that’s a fact.