This was such a fun read. I passed my driving test on my 16th birthday. I was perfect and I knew it, in a 4 on the floor baby blue Toyota Corolla, I might add. Out of 100 I was scored at a 95. I asked him what I did wrong. He said nothing. I asked why I got a 95 instead of 100. "He said, "Because, my dear, there is no such thing as a "perfect" driver." I have never forgotten that little gem of educational wisdom.
"How we grew ourselves from the filth of our regret."
As the Colonel's daughter growing up overseas, I didn't gain my freedom via car until the very end of my senior year. I bummed rides and stayed a "baby" while others stole their freedom in cars. But your sentiment speaks to me (duh, always) as I find myself navigating my own personal Third Wheel phase... the stage where I'm the perpetual third wheel to my teens becoming adults. I'm the old lady at dinner doing the funny trendy emoting gestures while my adult daughters howl at how awkward and "cute" my not-knowing is to them. I'm the mom sitting with them at the ballet shooting disapproving glances while they have an uncontrolled giggle fest at the absurdity of a performance. I'm the Rebel Gurl now the Third Wheel to their adventures.
So, now, I am trying to recapture those fleeting moments of freedom before I became their mom. Those days of sleeping on couches and YOLO-ing my way through life, down the 101 through Gilroy and Ojai...onward, onward, onward.
First car was a Renegade Jeep with “J-JEEP” TX plates, we’d do flips over the roll bar at stoplights. Rum in a Big Gulp, it was the 80s. “Super Freak” on cassette. Misheard lyric: “when I get there she has intertwining candles”. Do they sell those at Wicks ‘N’ Sticks? Always wondered what that meant & why it was kinky—adulthood must be so weird!
I am LOLing because I am seeing Bad Religion next week. Ah, I feel perpetually 15 years old... (I failed my permit test, but went to another town over to take my driving test, because rumor was they passed everyone. I did pass, so they were probably right.)
I loved reading this... my first personalized license plate read
HIOFICR because when you start to drive in rural Kansas you (i) had many opportunities to talk to the cops. we could get our permit at 14 because of tractors...? my first encounter talking to the police was being pulled over driving my friend's stick shift Ford escort. since I didn't know how to drive a stick shift, my friend would yell clutch! and then jam it into 2nd 3rd and then 4th. It was exhilarating speeding on those country roads until I popped over a hill and saw the lights...
(as I am telling this I am remembering that although my friends had turned 14, I must have still been 13 and didn't even have a permit. ) I knew another friend's soc security number - (and can still remember it today)-blurted it out to the officer after explaining I left my license at home. He humored me but pretty soon it was time to face the music. I think I was grounded for 3 months... now raising my kids in the bay area, their first driving experiences will most likely be in much more controlled environments. I hadn't thought about this in awhile- thanks as always for the realness!
Yes. While my 17 year old has her permit, we've been lazy about learning to drive because she's also an anxious kid. As she moves closer to graduation, I know that this is a necessary step to her independence. It makes me think about how much time I spent in my car when I was young. I got my license when I was 14 and my first car when I was 16, my Chevy Spectrum that I always secretly called my Chevy Speculum. I got grounded for my first speeding ticket, which led to my first big lie to my father that still to this day he talks about. So much time spent in the backseat with the father of my children with whom I've been ever since (24 years and counting). Huge groups of friends driving around out in the hills in New Mexico for hours doing everything and nothing. So much time was spent in that car with friends that I still love and friends that I've lost touch with and will never see again.
I totaled that car when I was 17 (not my fault). I look back on the times I spent after I got my first car and think about how differently my girls' lives have been. By the time I was my oldest daughter's age I had had so many more experiences than she currently has. Everything is so different. She is so different than I was. The world is so much more volatile than it seemed then. I'm having trouble letting go and allowing the freedom I know she needs as she reaches for adulthood. But time goes by whether you want it to or not.
My other daughter will be 16 in April. She has already informed me that she will be getting in a car accident. My guess is this summer will be full of driving lessons and anxiety and embracing all the moments I can get with those girls. Time goes by. Always.
I still feel like this when I’m in my car alone. It’s MY time and MY music and MY choice where to go. As soul crushing as LA traffic often is, I’ve reframed it as a respite with so many playlists depending on my mood, my favorite being ‘Songs by Woman To Scream-Sing in The Car.’ (Top 3: Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover, Glamorous Life + All Around The World) xx
All of this is so freaking good. Felt it in my bones though I was a good girl growing up, an evangelical Christian being so fucking careful not to fuck things up. But I still felt this. So beautiful. Thank you for sharing.
This was such a fun read. I passed my driving test on my 16th birthday. I was perfect and I knew it, in a 4 on the floor baby blue Toyota Corolla, I might add. Out of 100 I was scored at a 95. I asked him what I did wrong. He said nothing. I asked why I got a 95 instead of 100. "He said, "Because, my dear, there is no such thing as a "perfect" driver." I have never forgotten that little gem of educational wisdom.
"How we grew ourselves from the filth of our regret."
As the Colonel's daughter growing up overseas, I didn't gain my freedom via car until the very end of my senior year. I bummed rides and stayed a "baby" while others stole their freedom in cars. But your sentiment speaks to me (duh, always) as I find myself navigating my own personal Third Wheel phase... the stage where I'm the perpetual third wheel to my teens becoming adults. I'm the old lady at dinner doing the funny trendy emoting gestures while my adult daughters howl at how awkward and "cute" my not-knowing is to them. I'm the mom sitting with them at the ballet shooting disapproving glances while they have an uncontrolled giggle fest at the absurdity of a performance. I'm the Rebel Gurl now the Third Wheel to their adventures.
So, now, I am trying to recapture those fleeting moments of freedom before I became their mom. Those days of sleeping on couches and YOLO-ing my way through life, down the 101 through Gilroy and Ojai...onward, onward, onward.
First car was a Renegade Jeep with “J-JEEP” TX plates, we’d do flips over the roll bar at stoplights. Rum in a Big Gulp, it was the 80s. “Super Freak” on cassette. Misheard lyric: “when I get there she has intertwining candles”. Do they sell those at Wicks ‘N’ Sticks? Always wondered what that meant & why it was kinky—adulthood must be so weird!
I am LOLing because I am seeing Bad Religion next week. Ah, I feel perpetually 15 years old... (I failed my permit test, but went to another town over to take my driving test, because rumor was they passed everyone. I did pass, so they were probably right.)
I loved reading this... my first personalized license plate read
HIOFICR because when you start to drive in rural Kansas you (i) had many opportunities to talk to the cops. we could get our permit at 14 because of tractors...? my first encounter talking to the police was being pulled over driving my friend's stick shift Ford escort. since I didn't know how to drive a stick shift, my friend would yell clutch! and then jam it into 2nd 3rd and then 4th. It was exhilarating speeding on those country roads until I popped over a hill and saw the lights...
(as I am telling this I am remembering that although my friends had turned 14, I must have still been 13 and didn't even have a permit. ) I knew another friend's soc security number - (and can still remember it today)-blurted it out to the officer after explaining I left my license at home. He humored me but pretty soon it was time to face the music. I think I was grounded for 3 months... now raising my kids in the bay area, their first driving experiences will most likely be in much more controlled environments. I hadn't thought about this in awhile- thanks as always for the realness!
Yes. While my 17 year old has her permit, we've been lazy about learning to drive because she's also an anxious kid. As she moves closer to graduation, I know that this is a necessary step to her independence. It makes me think about how much time I spent in my car when I was young. I got my license when I was 14 and my first car when I was 16, my Chevy Spectrum that I always secretly called my Chevy Speculum. I got grounded for my first speeding ticket, which led to my first big lie to my father that still to this day he talks about. So much time spent in the backseat with the father of my children with whom I've been ever since (24 years and counting). Huge groups of friends driving around out in the hills in New Mexico for hours doing everything and nothing. So much time was spent in that car with friends that I still love and friends that I've lost touch with and will never see again.
I totaled that car when I was 17 (not my fault). I look back on the times I spent after I got my first car and think about how differently my girls' lives have been. By the time I was my oldest daughter's age I had had so many more experiences than she currently has. Everything is so different. She is so different than I was. The world is so much more volatile than it seemed then. I'm having trouble letting go and allowing the freedom I know she needs as she reaches for adulthood. But time goes by whether you want it to or not.
My other daughter will be 16 in April. She has already informed me that she will be getting in a car accident. My guess is this summer will be full of driving lessons and anxiety and embracing all the moments I can get with those girls. Time goes by. Always.
I still feel like this when I’m in my car alone. It’s MY time and MY music and MY choice where to go. As soul crushing as LA traffic often is, I’ve reframed it as a respite with so many playlists depending on my mood, my favorite being ‘Songs by Woman To Scream-Sing in The Car.’ (Top 3: Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover, Glamorous Life + All Around The World) xx
All of this is so freaking good. Felt it in my bones though I was a good girl growing up, an evangelical Christian being so fucking careful not to fuck things up. But I still felt this. So beautiful. Thank you for sharing.
!!!!!