refuse feedback (when you need to) and it will set you free

in defense of an occasionally closed comment section, paywalling the personal and the difference between resilience and bravery, unlikability and hate.

for when you’re willing to show a dirty screen (because it’s honest) but don’t want to be given advice for how to clean it and/or why you should

A few years ago, after two decades of allowing anyone to read my work freely and then comment on said work (life), I started closing comments on Instagram posts that were vulnerable, emotionally charged or tender. Dirty screens, if you will.

I did this not because I wanted to shut anyone out or push anyone away — the opposite, actually. By setting a boundary I was able to feel safe writing freely. I was able to say to whoever was reading — you do not need to respond. Please don’t respond. Just read it if you want to and feel the way you want to feel about it but don’t tell me that my screen is dirty. I know it’s dirty. I am showing it to you, not because it makes me bad or good but because it is true.